Do you ever?

Do you ever need a break from everything so bad that you can barely breathe?

Do you ever get that break and not have a clue what you want to do or what exactly it is you need?

Do you ever want to scream at the top of your lungs so that someone will listen?

Do you ever think that if you scream, no one will hear you?

Do you ever just want to go on strike and see if anyone notices or cares?

Do you ever wish and wish and wish your daughter didn’t have special needs?

Do you ever hate yourself for thinking that?

Do you ever think you’re not good enough?

Do you ever hate yourself for thinking that?

Do you ever feel as though you have so much to say, on a blog, in a book, to your partner, but then when it comes down to it you are rendered silent?

Do you ever feel as though there is more, more, more that awaits you but you are too damn tired and overwhelmed to even glimpse it?

Do you ever wonder how anyone makes it through parenting and marriage and life?

Do you ever wish you could be Jennifer Garner (insert favorite celebrity here) just for a day?

Do you ever want to get in the car and just…go?

Do you ever sit and think “what if I’m stuck at this job for the forseeable future” and wonder if you’ll truly go insane?

Do you ever want to go to the store and buy Doritos and Pringles and Reese’s peanut butter cups and cheesecake and ice cream and just give your body a giant middle finger?

Do you ever just want to sit and finish a book?

Do you ever want to sit and play Candy Crush and Ruzzle and Word with Friends and ignore all of your responsibilities?

Do you ever not want to get out of bed?

Do you ever wish you had your 19-year-old body back and then laugh because you hated that body when you were 19?

Do you ever have so many thoughts in your head that you can’t sleep or feel like you might explode?

Yeah, me neither.

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13 responses to “Do you ever?

  1. Yes. Pretty much yes to all that right.this.very.minute.

  2. The get in the car and go thing…Oh yeah.

  3. every. day. sometimes twice. love you. I would hear your screams :o)

  4. Kari Kampwerth

    šŸ™‚ You are a woman I would like to meet someday! In my book, no hollywood actor or actress is more admirable.

  5. Thank you for being the voice of moms today. You know how to tap into all the things we feel but might not know how to articulate.
    Thank you for reminding us that even in the loneliest times we are not actually alone
    šŸ™‚

  6. Yep feel those feelings every day. I think I’m just now realizing I’m the grown-up and that’s just hard work šŸ˜‰

  7. Nope. None of this ever happens to me. Never. I’m the perfect mom, the perfect wife, the perfect friend. Ha. I do so hope my sarcasm is coming through in those first few sentences.

  8. The 19 year old body thing…I’m only 23 and I already kick myself for not appreciating my effortlessly flat tummy at 17! What I tell myself is: in ten years I’m gonna wish I had this body back. And I’m gonna keep telling myself that til I’m 90 because it will always be true! Thanks for keeping it real.

  9. YES. Sometime ago you wrote a post that talked about really needing some alone time and all the places that sound promising (sound familiar? I hope I’m not making this up). One of the places you listed was prison and I was like, really? NOW I UNDERSTAND.

    And everything else on this list? Yes. Amen.

  10. Oh my god! You’re in my head. Well, except the daughter thing. Sometimes I’m so tired, so annoyed, so frustrated that I want to scream and then run away. I’m totally trying to find a balance to deal with everything. Oh and at 19, I was careless with my beauty. I want to go back in time and shake myself and say “Get a picture of you in The Dress, so you have proof you were a hot, young thing!”
    And *hugs*. I adore you.

  11. Yes. Yes. And YES!! I’ve had so many of these thoughts, most just in the past week. Thank you for voicing them. THANK YOU!!

  12. There’s this song called “The Way” about getting in the car and leaving it all behind and I found it on iTunes the other day (hadn’t heard it in years) and now…every once in a while when no-one’s around…I put it on and dance around the room. I know it’s silly, but for some reason I feel better.

  13. Quite a few in there I can relate to. Being a grown up is hard work, why the heck did we want to grow up so fast it’s obvious we were totally clueless!

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