Why Can’t I Relax?

We’re a week into summer and I’ve discovered that I don’t know how to relax. I’m done with work until August, the kids are done with school and I still act as though I have a certain amount of things done in a day or I’m crap.

I know I say this often…but what the hell is wrong with me?

I wake up stressed and anxious over all I “need” to get done when in reality the only thing I HAVE to do is take care of my kids. We can go swim, we can go minigolf, we can read, we can watch a movie, we can do whatever. But I am having a really hard time settling in. I’m all worried and anxious about the house being clean or the laundry being done or planning the golf outing or a million other things. I think after months and months of going full-speed, I’ve forgotten how to move into the slow lane.

Again, I ask you, what the hell is wrong with me?

I’ve been good about planning something run each day for the kids and I but really bad at taking time to just relax. My goal this summer was to have fun and relax. Why am I so bad at it? That’s part of what I am looking forward to on vacation—relaxing. There’s no laundry, no cleaning, just fun…but can I relax? I hope so.

Tomorrow I’m going to relax. I’m doing it if it kills me!!!

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6 responses to “Why Can’t I Relax?

  1. I’m the same way Tiffany. Neal just said to me the other day that I didn’t know how to relax anymore. I am always anxious about what has to get done next. Even when I sit down at night to read a book or something I have a hard time relaxing. When you learn how to relax, show me how too.

  2. It’s like a skill you can lose! And I do lose it. While i was on vacation with kids last week, I spent the first few days with a racing mind, thinking, OK, what do I have to do next…what do I have to do next? Slowly that faded and I could think complete thoughts! One of my thoughts was that the last time I felt REALLY relaxed was when I was recovering from surgery, and there was nothing I could do about anything, and no one expected anything from me!
    For me, I think it helps to tell myself, “You don’t HAVE to (do/go… whatever),” if something is stressing me out, even if it is a long-scheduled appt., or something fun like my AquaZumba class or lunch with friends. I usually end up keeping these commitments, but I think it helps take the pressure off. I imagine taking a sick day or personal day from being a mom. Yeah, I know that’s not possible, but I can still try to visualize it.
    Also, I will ask myself, is this something that is going to be energizing or draining? Is it worth it?

  3. Hope you are relaxing! It’s so hard but have some fun, giggle, jump around and remember there will always be laundry and dishes to do…so they won’t be bothered if you ignore them for a bit:)

  4. I have a very hard time relaxing too. I have found something that helps me. I have a large dry erase board. I write down the things that I want to get done for that day so that I feel I have been productive. Once I finish the projects I wipe them off. If I think of other things I need to do, I write those down for the next day. I have found if I don’t do this I will clean or do projects all day and never do anything fun or relaxing.

  5. Nothing is wrong with you! We are just hardwired to worry and stress about everything 24/7…It’s going to take you a bit to adjust at more free time 🙂

  6. I think certain personalities are meant to be wired this way. I am actively pursuing yoga and meditation, as well as journaling, to calm my monkey mind. You are definitely not alone!

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