Your Know You’re a Mother When…

You know you’re a mother when…

Your kids or, sadly, one of your friend’s kids has snot coming out of their nose and you don’t hesitate to use your sleeve to grab it.

Same said children are finished with their bubblegum and you don’t hesitate to put it in the palm of your hand until you can find a garbage can.

Your current goal weight is your “fat” weight from college.

You’ve forgotten what your belly button looks like. Is it in there somewhere?

You’ll tell the kids it’s ok to watch a movie, play Black Ops or eat all of the candy in the house so you can have 10 minutes to: go to the bathroom, guzzle a glass of wine, read a book or have sex with your husband. Or if you’re really quick, all 4.

You’ve uttered the words “BECAUSE I SAID SO!” even though pre-kids you swore you would never do that.

You hear a crying baby and worry you’re going to start leaking. Even though you’re not breastfeeding and haven’t in 6 years.

You’ve shown up to pre-school dropoff or pick-up with giant rings of breastmilk soaking your shirt…and you don’t care.

You pee a little in your pants when you jump on a trampoline. Or cough while doing aerobics. Or laugh really hard. Or sneeze.

You can sing along to the theme songs from Barney, The Wiggles, Sesame Street, Dora, Blues Clues, The Backyardigans and Arthur.

You have driven in your minivan at least once with said music on and you didn’t notice until you were at the stoplight belting out the song and saw the person next to you staring. And the windows were down.

You can go into your minivan any day of the week and find the following: a lego minifigure, a french fry, a wrapper from fruit snacks, a banana peel and a wadded up tissue. Please don’t tell me if that’s just me.

While doing laundry, you don’t even get grossed out by the giant skid marks in your sons’ underwear.

You can’t remember the last time you had a good night’s sleep, a day to yourself, folded and put away laundry or a really romantic weekend.

You don’t care about any of these things because you know you have never, ever felt love like this before and you wouldn’t trade it for anything.

**From Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop prompt: You know you’re a mother when…**


9 responses to “Your Know You’re a Mother When…

  1. When I was first dating my now Hubby & he went to clean out my ‘single mom car’ he was horrified at the things he found! Apples & peanut butter {who knows how old} in a cup holder may not have been the worst of it! We no longer eat in the car LOL

  2. love it! and i totally am there with you on every single one of them. one more i can add….when you are covered in someone else’s vomit/poop/pee and aren’t completely disgusted. i never thought i would be that mom who could take care of THREE kids all fighting a stomch virus without being totally grossed out. ya just change your shirt and keep on keepin’ on!! lol

  3. It is amazing what you get used to when you become a parent. But that 10 minutes you mentioned sounds heavenly!

  4. You’re absolutely right. Oh the things we moms have to deal with. Yet, wouldn’t trade it for the world. Thanks for sharing this.

  5. Love it. Great post! I’ve done the snot thing too…Ewww!!!
    Stopping in from MamaKat’s.

  6. To add to this: “Same said children are finished with their bubblegum and you don’t hesitate to put it in the palm of your hand until you can find a garbage can.” . . .

    When you become someone’s permanent flight attendant.

    Meaning, you are forever being handed someone else’s trash to get rid of and asked to get them a glass of water. Why oh why can children never find their own trash can?

  7. Love!
    this is a fantastic list!

  8. I am always amazed, though I shouldn’t be, by the things I find in my car whenever I clean it… It’s most certainly not just you!

  9. I love this post!!! The one that made me literally LOL was the one about the 10 mins hahahahaha!!! You crack me up!! Motherhood is freaking wonderful, and worth every single thing listed!! You are a cute mommy!

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