I think it’s crazy that I like to exercise; most other people do too. But I do love it. I love it not just because of the endorphin high I get after I’m done, although that’s pretty awesome. I love it not just because it lets me eat like a normal human being, although that’s wonderful too. I love it because I think it does something for your mind in a major way.
When I’m running, which I am learning to love after a long, hate-filled relationship, I just keep thinking “one foot in front of the other”. Before I’m set to run, I get nervous and anxious because it’s always been so difficult and unenjoyable for me to go for a run. I have to remind myself that I can do it. That all I have to do is put one foot in front of the other for as long as I can. I have to tell myself that if I need a break, I can take it. I’m allowed to walk for a bit. I’m allowed to go only 4 instead of 5 miles or 5 instead of 6. I just keep going until I can’t go anymore. That sounds a lot like my life; does is sound like yours?
When I’m doing my Turbofire music, it reminds me of when I was young and loved to stay out until 2 a.m. with my best friends and dance. We danced all night until we were a sweaty mess. We didn’t care who was watching, what we looked like or if we knew any moves; we just danced. Every time I crank up the music on my TV and do the moves along with Chalene and crew, I feel young again. I sweat like a beast and am always sore the next day. It reminds me that it’s good to feel uninhibited and young once in a while.
As I’m riding my bike down the trail or on my spinning bike in the basement, I push myself. Go faster, I tell myself. Crank the resistance up higher. Work harder. You can do it. I tell myself that Olivia works this hard all day long. If she can do her therapy, go to school and come home with a smile on her face, then you can get up that hill. Push! Go! Work harder. Do more.
When I’m lifting weights, which I really don’t like at all, I’m thinking of my 50 pound girl who still needs me to lift her. I can’t be a lightweight and help Olivia like she needs. Lift more. Heavier. Get stronger. For her. That’s the difference for me these days. It’s not about being thinner, although that’s a nice bonus. It’s about being stronger. In my mind and in my body. For me, for him, for them.
If you put all that together, is it a wonder why I like to exercise? When I’m done, I’m on an endorphin high, I feel stronger, I feel like I’ve accomplished something major. That is a great feeling.