A while ago I bought a Groupon to Britepix so that I could transfer all of my home movies to DVD. But before I could send them in, I wanted to make sure of what was on the tape. So we all trudged up to Olivia’s room to watch because that’s the only VCR left in our house. (Do you remember your family buying your first VCR? I remember it like it was yesterday. It was so exciting and so cool. And now totally gone. So weird. I’m old.)
Olivia cried while we watched the videos until she started looking like she does now. When she was still a baby, it freaked her out. The best part was Gabe laughing hysterically when we got to the part of the video when we brought him home from the hospital. We looked at him and wondered what was so funny? In between complete, full-body laughs he finally got out “Olivia’s bigger than me!” He thought that was damn near the funniest thing he’d ever seen. He doesn’t remember a time when Olivia was bigger. Since they’re only 13 months apart, and she’s tiny and he’s big, ever since he was about one, he’s been bigger.
I love that he found that so funny because it didn’t even cross my mind, but to him it was hysterical. When I stopped to think about it later, it is pretty hilarious. To see the tiny sister that you tower over and take care of be bigger than you and more advanced than you would be pretty funny.
Matthew just kept asking when he was coming home. There was a lot of video before he finally arrived. We were all laughing then at how big he was. Matthew was the fattest baby I’d ever seen…and still have ever seen. At 3 months he was 20 lbs and I think 15 of it was in his cheeks. Now he’s tall and skinny. Go figure.
There was a moment when we were watching Olivia’s first bath at home and Matt looked and me and said “Oh my God. We didn’t know yet.” I immediately started to tear up because I had just had the same thought. We found out when Olivia was 4 days old and this was day 2. We didn’t know. Our world hadn’t been completely rocked yet. I just stared and wasn’t sure what I was feeling. Part of me was yelling “Enjoy these last 2 days of normal! Run! Run!” and the other part of me was thinking “Even though you won’t realize it for a while, your world is going to change for the better.” I don’t know why but it was very emotional.
You know what else I noticed? We laugh a lot as a family. Matt and I joke and laugh a lot and so do the kids. Most of the home movies were of dinner time or just playing, not major moments. I was so happy to see that we have so much evident joy in our lives. I hope that continues.
When I finally get my DVDs from Britepix (they said it will take until October!), I’m hoping I can share some bits of them with you. They’re pretty awesome.
Elastamom's Excerpts 
“We didn’t know yet.”
What a stunning and surreal realization to have. All I can say is, you’ve handled it with grace and humor and a whole lot of love. And that’s more than most of us can hope to do when presented with similar unexpected and not entirely welcome changes. Keep laughing and loving and filming, friend.
Isn’t it weird how sometimes you define your life as before you knew and after? When I look back at pictures and videos from when Little Eddie was sick and hooked up to a pump 20 hours a day and had an ostomy bag, I can define the entire picture or video as it being before he was heeled, before his surgery, after his surgery, etc. It isn’t about what how old he was in months or what part of the year we were in, it was what stage of his sickness we were in. It is quite defining! Of course our lives are forever changed, but always, ALWAYS for the better š
That is so cool. My kids love watching old family videos too. Tessa always wants to know when she will be in one :o) We have tons of 8 mm video tapes. Do they do those too?
This is so beautiful. I am excited to see these snippets.
This is touching. What a great way to treasure and preserve these memories.
I love home movies! One of my favorite things is to watch old videos, I never get sick of it!
This is beautiful. I would be worried if you weren’t emotional about those videos. How wonderful that you have those moments on video – that you have a time when you realize that you didn’t know yet. My heart was aching for you. But I remember being with you near the beginning – you were both so bold, so protective, so amazing. You are right – Olivia changed your lives for the better. I am certainly better for knowing her.
I had to laugh at Gabe! I don’t remember a time when Olivia was bigger than Gabe! She was always so tiny!!! I probably would have laughed at that if I had seen it too!
Truly a special time for your family š
I had 6 months of “normal” and I thinking back at time was so perfect. All the smiles and not knowing any better, just having my perfect little guy. Then the shock of finding out and the fog of the years following. But years later I finally feel like things are falling into place and the fog lifts just enough to see the colorful horizen.
All the past years are reeling in my head memory by memory. Thanks for sharing.
I love watching home videos… and I love that we live in a time where we can archive anything and everything!!!! Lucky you for converting those over!!! I think our family needs to do that ASAP. And yes you have to share some of them with us!!! I want to see Gabe with these chunky darling cheeks!!! I could totally see why that would bring back a wave of emotions when you were giving O a bath. I mean she is your daughter, your first child and you were reliving all of the positive emotions along with the shock too. I mean just watching what Brittany went through, I can understand why it would bring back tears to watch too!!!!
Sorry I thought Gabe was the baby… but I just saw it was Matthew
I bet they’re pretty awesome. You have an awesome family. And Gabe laughing over Olivia being bigger than him, hilarious.