Last Saturday night I had the pleasure of going out to dinner with some of the other third grade Moms from my kid’s school. One of the topics that came up was guilt. Then I got to thinking about guilt and how my mind works and I haven’t been able to get it off my mind since.
I am a terrible sleeper and I think one of the reasons is…my mind. I just can’t shut it off. No matter what I try, I just can’t shut it down. I take that back…Tylenol P.M. helps knock me out. But I really don’t want to have to take sleeping pills forever. That would be bad, right? Here’s a typical “attempting to fall asleep” scenario…
I really need to go to sleep now. I get up really early.
I can’t believe I’m co-chair of field day and it’s this Friday.
I can’t believe I’m PTA president for the next two years.
We really need to increase PTA attendance. How will I do that?
What if I suck?
Do I have all the things we need for field day on Friday?
Will the kids have fun?
Will the popsicles melt before the kids get them?
How am I going to survive 10 days without my husband?
Is Gabe’s baseball uniform clean for his game tomorrow?
I’m so behind on laundry it’s not even funny.
Do I really have to give up my entire Saturday for high school graduation this week? Hello? Laundry?
Will my MIL remember she’s babysitting Friday?
My stomach is disgusting. I’m never eating again and I will do 1000 situps a day.
I think we’re getting pizza for dinner tomorrow. And I need more wine.
Shit! The end of school is next week and I haven’t organized a teacher gift.
Would they rather have Target or a restaurant? Flowers?
Crap! I need to order a workbook for Gabe to work on this summer.
I need to organize our “school stuff” for this summer.
What am I going to do with Olivia all summer?
Matthew wants to go to soccer camp. I’ve got to find one.
I’ve got to exchange those flip flops and those capris at Old Navy.
We need mulch. And time to spread it.
Did I remember to bid on that left-handed catcher’s mitt on ebay for Gabe?
What am I going to get my 17-year-old nephew for his birthday? Cash? Is that lame?
Crap! I forgot to post something for my blog tomorrow. That’s ok, I can do it in the morning. How many more hours until my alarm goes off?
Are my Mom and sister ok? I hope so.
I think my friend is mad at me. I’m not sure why.
I really need to lose weight.
I think we’re ordering pizza tomorrow.
Oh boy! Golf night is tonight!!! I get to hang out with Amy.
I wish it was Friday night already.
Did I spend enough quality time with the kids today? Does Matthew think I’m a terrible mother because I work?
We need to read more books.
It’s time to sign up for summer reading club at the library. We need to go to the library tomorrow.
What time is it??? Ack! I need to go to sleep.
Now that you think I’m totally crazy, you can see why I can’t sleep.
Is it just me?