Christmas in the PICU

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The first three months flew by. Little Man and Baby Girl would go to school, She and Sweet Pea would nurse and nap and snuggle, and then the two oldest would be home for lunch and a nap. Then play time and dinner and baths and bed. It was mundane, ordinary and blissful all at the same time. Sweet Pea was such a good baby. Her friends would ask if he ever cried. It was as if he knew he was the third child and would just have to wait his turn. It was like he knew She would get to him eventually. So he was patient and good-natured and extremely lovable.

Plus he had rolls upon rolls of baby fat to love.

He was enjoying this third child immensely. He had missed out on a lot with the first two with working full-time and going to school too. He was constantly commenting on how much He didn’t remember from when the other two were little and how much he was loving watching Sweet Pea grow. And boy did he grow!! At his 3 month well visit, he was just shy of 20 lbs. That was huge!!! Huge and healthy.

After three months it was Christmas. Presents were bought, wrapped and put under the tree. She had fun trying to get the perfect picture for their first Christmas card as a family of five. But Sweet Pea was sick. Very sick.

Christmas night he just didn’t seem himself. He wasn’t happy like usual. He was really fussy. He seemed really sick. She nursed him before bed and put him in his crib and tried to get a couple of hours of sleep. But She was so worried. So She slept on his floor in front of his crib so She could hear him if he needed Her. Before She knew it, it seemed as though he was struggling to breathe. She knew that type of breathing. It sounded as though he was having an asthma attack. She bundled him up, woke Him up to tell Him She was taking him to the hospital and sped off.

Every time She’d been to the ER before with Baby Girl or Little Man, they had to wait for hours and it was no big deal. This time the triage nurse took one look at Sweet Pea and all of a sudden everyone swarmed. He was given a breathing treatment (she didn’t even know there was such a thing for babies!), given oxygen and the doctor was in all within minutes. She knew this was serious.

Sweet Pea perked up a little after getting the treatment and oxygen, but was still not ok. The nurse asked if She would like a cup of coffee (it was 3 a.m.) and said to get comfortable. All of a sudden She was panicked. What was going to happen to her baby?

She heard “admit” and “PICU” being said amongst the nurses and doctors. He was being admitted. To the PICU. She knew that wasn’t good. They had to put an IV in and, since he was only 3 months old, they would have to put it in his head. She wasn’t sure She could stomach that so She left the room. The nurses encouraged her to leave as it would be really difficult to watch Her baby go through that.

After the IV was in, She went back in the room and cuddled him ferociously. She was able to hold him in Her arms all the way up to the PICU.

But She was worried. Her baby couldn’t breathe. They were in the PICU. She didn’t know what was going on.

Merry Christmas.