**Thank you to Momalom for hosting this awesome 5 for 10 series…I loved every minute of it!**
Matt always teases me that I’m like Mustafa from Austin Powers The Spy Who Shagged Me. (Click on his name to watch the clip.) He says that all the kids have to do is ask me three times and I change my mind.
Sadly, it’s true.
Partly it’s because I’m tired. They’ve asked me all day long for all sorts of different things and I’ve said no. They know I’m weak and my defenses are down and they’ll win. I’ve been at it all day and I’ve had enough.
Sometimes though I just don’t think first. I automatically say no. “Can I have a popsicle?” No. “Can I have a friend over?” No. “Can we go to the park?” No.
But when I stop and think for a minute I realize that “YES!” would be an ok answer too…and that’s when I change my mind. So I’ve been trying to train myself to stop and think before I answer…and to say yes more often.
CK at Bad Mommy Moments (If you haven’t read it yet…are you living under a rock? 😉 ) has a great post about saying yes. It’s so poignant and so true. I’m trying to follow by example.
One thing we’re going to do this summer is have at least one “YES!” day. I read about this in Family Fun magazine a long time ago and thought it was a great idea…but haven’t done it yet. From now until the end of the school year, I’ll write down all the things I say no to…and then on Yes! day we’ll pick some out and do them.
And who knows…I may just say Yes! to some other things too. There’s nothing wrong with ice cream for breakfast once in a while, right?
Elastamom's Excerpts 
Hee hee when I check in before bed I get to be first!! I so like the idea of Yes day. We have also been working Rex being realistic and asking for appropriate things. The fact that he is learning about time is helping tons. Don’t ask to play a game when you know its 7:30 and you still haven’t showered or brushed your teach and its only 1/2 hour before bed.
Riley is an entirely different story that I’m going to go to bed instead of diving in to 🙂
Hmmmm….interesting. I say no ALOT….but that’s because they ask ridiculous questions! LOL. Maybe I’ll try this out and it will make everyone’s life easier around here.
That’s a great idea. I think I’ll do that too.
Can we go on vacation?
YES!!
Can Mommy hang out on the beach all day with a margarita?
YES!!
Love this game…
I do this all of the time and I know that I am creating the “if I bug her she will give in” mind frame. I need to think first too.
I know EXACTLY what you mean. I tell my husband that when 4:00 hits, I am too tired to parent. I let my daughter run around creating chaos while I lay on the couch in a dumb stupor. True story.
As for saying yes? I am trying to do this more often as well. It requires so much more effort.
I think I need to have more “yes” in my life too! 🙂 I will follow your lead.
I am a no mom too. I like the idea of saying yes once a day during the summer. Although I have a sinking feeling I may regret it by the end of it :)!
I find myself doing the same thing. No is just easier, especially if all my attention isn’t there. Then they ask again and I say yes. No wonder my kids are confused.
I probably say no a lot.
I do say yes when my kids request ice cream for dinner though. Yum.
It’s not that I don’t want to say yes more often, it’s just a little scary.
I like the idea of a “yes” day! I’m gonna have to try that with the boys… it’s bound to help!
So funny that you are writing about this….I have been having the same thoughts. I realized that I was on an automated ‘no’ response to everything. So I’ve been saying yes a lot, unless there is a real good reason to say no. That way, I figure when I do say no they’ll know that I mean it!
Yesterday, after I dropped Alexandra at school Lorelai asked if we could stop and get her a donut. I thought about it for a second and said, yes!. It was no big deal and it made her SO happy!
I couldn’t agree more! I totally believe that the more you say yes, the easier it is and the more you see the positivity flowing. I think throwing out unexpected yesses are a great way to get the fun flowing:)
Hi elastamom!
Greetings from Malaysia again! Just want to say thank you for dropping by my blog on my SITS day. You can read the aftermath of my whole day SITting episode at this link:
http://imafulltimemummy.blogspot.com/2010/05/afternath-of-whole-day-sitting.html
Thank you again and hope to see you back here sometime! 😀
Warmest Regards,
Jenny aka I’m a full-time mummy
(http://imafulltimemummy.blogspot.com/)
Btw, the picture of your kids on your blog header are so beautiful!
One YES a day this summer–I love this idea. I’m converted. Who knows what will happen?
Love the yes day idea! We might actually give that a try. I can say yes for one day right? The whole world won’t collapse right? My children won’t try to sell each other at the park right???
Um, no, there is absolutely nothing wrong with ice cream for breakfast. If there were, I’d be in trouble.
I tend to say No, as well, before I’ve even really comprehended the question. It’s really quite ridiculous. But I’ve found that a recent change in my perspective has made things easier with time. And realizing–really, truly comprehending–that my children are in their CHILDHOODS, and supposed to be having messy, good times as KIDS, has really helped me turn things around.
YES is fun. As long as I don’t have to seriously pay for it later, I am totally on board.
🙂
Elastamom! Thank you so much for the link, and for saying in one line what took me a whole post to truly realize, “…when I stop and think for a minute I realize that “YES!” would be an ok answer too.” That moment, that pause, really does make all the difference, doesn’t it?
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